||[Sep. 29th, 2008|05:27 am]
Tales of the Jedi
|||||Pendulum - Hold Your Colour||]|
Tella lay in one of her ship's cramped bunks, trying to sleep but failing horribly. It was so cold on this planet... did no one else feel the freezing bite of the air here? It would seem that she was the only one that could feel the shivers that ran down her spine. Either way, whether it be her insanity creeping back up again or just plain sensitivity, it was distracting and made it impossible to sleep. What was worse was that she didn't want to open her eyes. She refused to open them and see all the reflective metal surfaces that covered the ship - she was too afraid of her reflection now. Every time she saw it, it took on the form of her mother.
Cold but gentle hands caressed her cheek, but still she refused to open her eyes - she knew who this was.
"Have you come to fuck up my life some more or have your come to plead your innocence? Either way I'm not listening. Get out."
"Oh, love," said a soft female voice that rang melodically throughout the ship, "I think that's a bit dramatic."
"Being upset because you never told me why other children hated me? Why everyone stared at me back home? Why Dad resented me? Who I really was? Who you really were? Oh, I'm sorry, that'd make to much sense, wouldn't it?" Tella hissed with the venom of two centuries of pent up anger.
"You know I did that to protect you-"
"From what?! From myself?! Do you know how dumb you sound right now?! Did you think I couldn't handle the thought of you being a Jedi, of both of us being what we are?! If anything that would have helped me! At least then I wouldn't have felt alone for so long!" Tella's eyes shot open as the instinct to defend herself kicked in. Of course, there was nothing here but the reflection that was not her own. Its mouth moved though Tella's did not.
"Perhaps I underestimated your understanding. I'm sorry, all I ever wanted was a happy life for you, and you can see how that's turned out."
There was a long pause before Tella spoke again. "Make it up to me then. How do I get rid of this?"
Her mother's reflection shook her head. "You can't."
Tella clenched her teeth. "What do you mean I can't? All my life you never once changed!"
The reflection smiled weakly. "It gets harder the longer you don't do it, but it never goes away."
Tella stood now, shaking. It was not her mother's fault, she knew, but she still felt the urge to punch her in the face. Her fist went into the nearest wall, denting one of the reflections. To her dismay, however, she found that she'd only made a thousand more smaller reflections that smiled back at her. She punched the wall again and again, only creating more of the smiling faces. "STOP IT! STOP SMILING!" No matter how many times she hit them though, they kept smiling.
There was a knock at the door and Tella gritted her teeth. "LEAVE!" The voice that came from her lips was not her own, but instead an animal's.